Bracing vs. Grounded: A 90-Second Nervous System Check-In (That Changes Everything)

If you read last week’s post and thought, “Oh… I am bracing,” welcome. You’re not dramatic. You’re not failing. Your nervous system is just doing its job a little too well.

And here’s the thing: most people try to “fix” bracing with mindset.
But bracing isn’t a thought problem.

It’s a body habit.

So today I want to give you something small, simple, and wildly effective:

A 90-second check-in that helps you catch bracing while it’s happening—and shift without forcing yourself to “calm down.”

First: What “Grounded” Actually Feels Like

Grounded isn’t “zen.”
Grounded is less effort.

It usually feels like:

• your shoulders aren’t hovering near your ears

• your breath isn’t trapped in your chest

• your jaw is not secretly auditioning for a clenching competition

• your belly is soft enough to move

• your brain isn’t sprinting ahead of your life

Grounded is your body saying:
“I’m here. I’m safe enough. I can be in this moment.”

The 90-Second Check-In

Set a timer if you want. Or just do this casually while standing in your kitchen like a tired goddess.

Step 1: Find the brace (10 seconds)

Ask yourself:
Where am I gripping right now?

Common spots:

• jaw

• tongue pressed to the roof of the mouth

• shoulders

• hands

• belly

• glutes (yes, babe… unclench)

Pick one place. Not all. We’re not trying to renovate the whole house.

Step 2: Exhale like you mean it (30 seconds)

Inhale through your nose for 4.
Exhale through your mouth for 6–8.

On the exhale, release one thing:

• jaw drops

• shoulders melt

• hands open

• belly softens

If your brain tries to interrupt with a to-do list, just say:
“Not right now.”

Step 3: Add contact (30 seconds)

Put one hand somewhere supportive:

• chest

• belly

• back of neck

• cheek

Pressure + warmth tells your body: “I’m here.”
(And no, it’s not woo. It’s biology.)

Step 4: Give your nervous system one true sentence (20 seconds)

Pick one:

• “Nothing is chasing me right now.”

• “I’m allowed to go slower.”

• “I can be safe and still get things done.”

• “I don’t need to brace to be worthy.”

How to Know It’s Working

You’re not looking for instant bliss.
You’re looking for one notch of relief.

Signs it’s shifting:

• your breath drops lower

• your eyes soften

• your forehead relaxes

• you stop holding your body like it’s about to be judged

Even 5% softer counts. That’s the whole point.

A Tiny Practice for This Week

Do the 90-second check-in:

• once in the morning (before your phone if possible)

• once mid-day (when you feel “fine but tight”)

• once at night (before bed, especially if you clench at night)

You’re teaching your body:
“We don’t have to live on guard.”

Want help softening in real time?

That’s why I made the FREE Unclench Workshop replay — for the women who are functional… but tense.

✅ Grab the FREE Unclench Workshop replay

And if you want to understand your specific pattern of holding emotions:
✨ Take the Anger Archetype Quiz

No hard reset.
Just one exhale at a time.