What is Joy?

Is it laughing all the time and never crying?

Is it always smiling and never feeling or being sad?

Is it just emotional, like happiness or being excited?

Or is it something that takes root deep within us and manifests itself in how we walk throughout life?

I remember so distinctly during one of the darkest times of my life being told that I had joy. That I carried it and released it.

Crazy right? How often does that happen? When someone says we are the opposite of what we think or feel… I remember being so annoyed when I was told that. I’m pretty sure I internally rolled my eyes and a slew of “well if I’m so joyful why am I feeling the complete opposite?” thoughts ran rampant in my mind.

It was during that time that I realized that joy was so much more than emotions.

There are many things in life that we experience emotionally but never realize how much bigger they are; we never realize how these entities get to be roots grown deep within us. In my opinion, happiness and joy are different. To me, happiness is fickle and circumstantial. It’s conditional. I’m happy if A happens. If A does not happen, I am liable to be unhappy. Happiness is fleeting. Rush hour traffic can chip away at your happiness. Late meetings and poor customer service can rid you of any happiness you had. Offense, broken relationships, insecurities can all strip you of “happiness”. The list goes on. Many things can rob you of happiness, but joy? Joy is different.

Joy isn’t circumstantial. It’s not ignorant of the hard things. It is not elusive or impossible to attain. It’s not fleeting.

As I walked through that tough season a few years ago, I learned what joy truly was. I learned that it didn’t mean I laughed all the time. It didn’t mean I didn’t cry. It didn’t mean I didn’t feel pain, frustration, and anger. No. It was the opposite. Joy allowed me to feel all those things yet know that it didn’t get to define me. Joy showed me that it was first an internal reality I needed to build and cultivate. Joy showed me that it’s a choice. I get to choose joy. I get to choose to be rooted in what is true and not my circumstances.

I learned that joy isn’t cultivated when everything is going my way. Joy is cultivated and exercised when everything hits the fan and feels forever ruined. Joy shows up in the darkest of nights. And sometimes, when it shows up, it’ll come with laughter. Sometimes it’ll come with peace amidst the tear-stained journal entries. Sometimes, it’ll come as a deep knowing that what I’m going through won’t be forever.

I am constantly challenged by joy. For me, it’s easy to box joy into this external thing. I have joy if I’m always laughing and smiling and giddy. Which, I’m sorry, I don’t find that to be true. I think joy requires strength. It requires an ability to show up in the hardest of times. It requires contentment in the slowest of times. It requires consistency in the happiest of times. Joy gets to walk with us in every season and space of life. It gets to uncover itself and show us a new way of living life in every process we walk.

As I look at that season in my life where joy was cultivated and look at where I am now, I realize that joy can be found in the simplest of things. We don’t have to relegate only when things are hard or only when things are perfect.

Joy gets to step into the mundane---the everyday. It gets to ooze all over the routine and rhythm of life IF we let it.

Think about it? What would life look like if we found joy where we were? Instead of pining for what was or aching for what isn’t? What would life look like if joy was an internal reality we built and saw the fruit of it in the everyday?

It’s not the easiest thing. I won’t pretend I always choose joy. I don’t. There are days and nights when choosing joy feels impossible. It’s easier to wallow. It’s easier to nestle myself in the pain, frustration, and fear and find counterfeit comfort in that space. But honestly, at the end of the day, that's no way to live. That's no way to show up to life.

Choosing joy can often feel uncomfortable and contrived. But I’m learning that joy is something you work at; you get to grow and flex it. It’s something you fight for; you defend and guard it. It’s something you get to choose; you say yes to it every chance you get.

So, what is joy? Is it laughing all the time and never crying? Is it always smiling and never feeling or being sad? Is it just emotional, like happiness or being excited? Or is it something that takes root deep within us and manifests itself in how we walk throughout life?

I firmly believe it is the latter. I believe it is a seed we get to plant within our soul and cultivate to take root deep within. I believe as we choose joy and let its roots run deep, we get to feel it in laughter and excitement. We get to embrace it in times of discomfort. We get to see it fruit every day.